Evolution Is NOT Just A Theory

I was reading an article on THIS court ruling today, and I find it hard to believe that we are living in the 21st century and still calling Darwin the Devil.

What are you doing South? First you bite the hand that feeds you and declare war on us. Then you get your asses kicked but make up for it by perpetuating a situation of gross racial inequality for the next century which has resulted in a wave of hatred stemming from societal prejudice and economic division that we're still trying desperately to recover from. Then you royally fuck up two consecutive presidential elections in order to put this country on the fast track to financial, ecological, and judicial ruin. As if that weren't enough, now you're trying to undermine the entire public education system by putting stickers on textbooks that say, "Evolution is a theory, not a fact," and in the process have managed to frighten so many of your students away from the moral minefield science has become that the entire United States is facing a major shortage of scientists (which, by the way, is the only reason we've been the global top dog for so long. Try retaining the best military without the best scientists and see how far you get).

Well, I say no more, South. You're like the lazy younger sibling that mooches off its older successful brothers and sisters, and we've had it. To quote another such rant, just get the fuck out.

Luckily a handful of brave parents agree with me.

I suppose when residing in a location of the country as backwards as yourselves, you might be unfamiliar with the reality that most human beings progress forward. Yet, despite the difficulty of you Southern rednecks to wrap your little minds around this concept, you would independently think (if you valued such things) that you'd want to properly educate your children, in hopes that they might break out of the stereotype of being uneducated, close-minded Southerners.

But no.

Oh, and these stickers have the gall to say, "Keep an open mind while approaching this material." Open mind? Little hypercritical aren't we, for the part of the country that still flies the Confederate flag and points to tumbled-down buildings, and says, "Look North - that's what you did to us in the war!" I guess you don't care about all the problems you've given us before AND after "the War" (didn't anyone tell you World War II is called "the War" now? Seriously, get with it, South). Perhaps if we found you a good landscaper to renovate some of those burnt down plantations you'd get that chip off your shoulder. How does, "Extreme Makeover: Bible Belt Edition" sound?

But perhaps I'm being unfair.

As many critics pointed out, the stickers were a "fair compromise," respecting the beliefs of those who embrace Creationism as a theory. When I was in high school, one girl in my class believed in Creationism, and we thought she was crazy. But it was fine, she could believe what she wanted (and when her father thought it was cool to beat his children and make his wife sit in the back seat of the car because he thought God hated women, well, he was free to believe that too), because WE like to think this is a free country.

But despite that freedom of belief, she'll probably never get a job in the sciences, because if you want to be a scientist, having "beliefs" is not enough. Creationism doesn't even fall under the scientific heading of "theory," since a theory needs to have some factual basis in scientific research to be considered for that prestigious title. You can't just slap the word on some untested idea and call it viable. As such, Creationism as it stands falls under the category of "myth" or "legend," or "faith-based belief," but you don't see them putting that on the sticker.

Also, if you want to get into the mess of being inclusive in your education, where does it end? There is the "Flat-Earth" THEORY and that "Geocentric Model of the Solar System" THEORY that the Vatican finally rescinded 500 YEARS AFTER THE FACT, but you don't see people clamoring to teach their kids about the validity of the idea that we can sail off the edge of the globe or that the sun actually orbits the Earth.

Kudos to those six parents (only six?!) who had the unabashed gall to stand up and sue your Southern asses to stop what you were doing. I hope they don't get lynched. And I wonder where they were educated to be able to see clearly enough to do something about it. Probably not from below the Mason-Dixon Line if I had to wager.